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Three Little Words: A Memoir, by Ashley Rhodes-Courter
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"Sunshine, you're my baby and I'm your only mother. You must mind the one taking care of you, but she's not your mama." Ashley Rhodes-Courter spent nine years of her life in fourteen different foster homes, living by those words. As her mother spirals out of control, Ashley is left clinging to an unpredictable, dissolving relationship, all the while getting pulled deeper and deeper into the foster care system.
Painful memories of being taken away from her home quickly become consumed by real-life horrors, where Ashley is juggled between caseworkers, shuffled from school to school, and forced to endure manipulative,humiliating treatment from a very abusive foster family. In this inspiring, unforgettable memoir, Ashley finds the courage to succeed - and in doing so, discovers the power of her own voice.
- Sales Rank: #34854 in eBooks
- Model: 9781416948070
- Published on: 2008-06-20
- Released on: 2008-06-20
- Format: Kindle eBook
- Dimensions: 1.25" h x 5.75" w x 8.50" l, .0 pounds
From Booklist
“I felt as worthless as the junk in my trash bag . . . once again, I was the one being tossed out and thrown away.” Taken from her mother when she was scarcely four years old, Rhodes-Courter spent the next nine years in foster care with “more than a dozen so-called mothers.” “Some were kind,” she acknowledges, “a few were quirky and one . . . was as wicked as a fairy-tale witch.” She names names in this memoir, which is also a searing indictment of an often sadly deficient system of child care. Given her experiences, one can understand why she is angry and often bitter, but the unrelieved stridency of her tone makes for sometimes difficult reading. Nevertheless, she gives a voice to countless thousands of children who continue to be abused, abandoned, and ignored, and one hopes her book will make a positive difference in their lives. Grades 8-12. --Michael Cart
Review
"Quiet scenes cut deepest: the author's description of her only after-school visit to a friend's home lingers heartbreakingly in one's mind. This gifted young writer's moving and eye-opening story will especially appeal to fans of Jeannette Walls's The Glass Castle and David Pelzer's autobiographical books." --School Library Journal
About the Author
Ashley Rhodes-Courter has been featured in Teen People, The New York Times, USA TODAY, and Glamour, as well as on Good Morning America. Her first memoir, Three Little Words, began as an essay, which won a writing contest for high school students, and was published in The New York Times Magazine. She is also the author of Three More Words. A graduate of Eckerd College and a champion for the reformation of the foster care system, Ashley speaks internationally on foster care and adoption. Visit her at Rhodes-Courter.com.
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Essential for social workers and CASA workers.
By Amy Jess Johns
Heartbreaking but in a meaningful way. This story of Ashley Rhodes-Courter is important for people to learn about, especially those working in the social services system. Foster care often gets a bad rap, and unfortunately, this book shows how many (not all!) foster parents game the system to make money. But even more egregious is the social service workers and case managers that don't follow up or follow protocol. Many of them made her personal situation worse out of case overload, genuine apathy, and turning a blind eye to serious shortcomings.
The book also illustrates the role of Guardian ad Litem volunteers or CASAs. I'm one and this helped me to feel like I need to take very seriously how I work for the child, digging deeper into not just what is said or reported but what ISN'T said.
It's corny to say children are our future but it's true. When you have a set up where the government will pay strangers to care for children rather than assist the actual, willing parents to do so, you have a problem. Sure, some parents have proved to fail their kids but some genuinely could make a success with a little help. Instead, by going to foster care, sometimes the kids get lost in the system.
This book seems slanted in no particular direction, and the pain is palpable. But it shows how valuable volunteers are to the system and how children appreciate when someone designated to help them is doing it out of a sense of community rather than a paycheck. If interested, there's much info on how to volunteer with foster kids, and you don't have to feel at odds with the foster family, but actually be a supportive influence as you speak for the child.
173 of 178 people found the following review helpful.
Lost in the shuffle
By Inkhorn
Yesterday, my laundry hamper was full to overflowing demanding attention as I opened this book. I had seen the author on Good Morning America, and this seemed like an interesting story.
As I started to read thoughts of laundry disappeared, as I was riveted by this compelling story, of a little girl who just wanted to be loved by her mother, or a family.
I could not put this book down until I finished.
It was like I was there looking on as she went through these various ordeals/ adventures.
If you are considering adopting or fostering a child, this book is a must. As you read, you will understand what these children have to go through. That understanding brings compassion. You will also understand what would be parents go through because both sides of the story are told effectively.
If you work in childcare services, this ought to be required reading.
If you are like me, this is an inspiring story about surviving and succeeding against the odds. You may notice this story has a mythical quality, reminiscent of other stories like Oliver Twist, a Roald Dahl story, or even Anne of Green Gables or Harry Potter which the author refers to, except this is for real.
It is shocking to me how a system which is designed to protect children, can fail so miserably at times. How is it possible for a home that is only licensed to have two children end up with 10. How come foster children end up living in a trailer? The children do not have a voice that is heard.
I particularly commend Gay Courter her adoptive mother who also persisted against the odds, where some adoptive parents would have given up. She ended up with a remarkable child who has written a remarkable book, who I feel sure will continue to be a voice for foster children, and orphans.
Hope this was useful.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Moving tale of a messed up foster care program
By Robert A. Green
Three Little Words is a moving tale of a foster program in distress. If ever there was a need for new policies and procedures, it is in this program. The fact that Ashley Rhodes-Courter became the person she is, is due to a remarkable set of adoptive parents and her own inner strength. The number of paid people who interacted with Ashley, and her brother Luke, is well over 100; yet Ashley admits, and the book details, the two who helped her the most were volunteers. This is a great example of how volunteering can impact the lives of others and a reason why none of us should be willing to leave anything up to the "system".
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